Pope condemns farmers 'who play at being God'

THE Pope will deliver a blistering attack on the “satanic” mores of modern society today, warning against an “inane apologia of evil” that is in danger of destroying humanity.
In a series of Good Friday meditations that he will lead in Rome, the Pope will say that society is in the grip of a kind of “anti-Genesis” described as “a diabolical pride aimed at eliminating the family”. He will pray for society to be cleansed of the “filth” that surrounds it and be restored to purity, freed from “decadent narcissism”.

Particular condemnation is reserved for scientific advances in the field of agriculture. Warning against the move to “modify the very grammar of life as planned and willed by God”, the Pope will lead prayers against “insane, risky and dangerous” ventures in attempting “to take God’s place without being God by breeding staple crop plants for centuries to increase yield and breeding so-called domesticated animals for the sake of human consumption”.

The Pope has not actually composed the prayers for the traditional Way of the Cross, but it is clear that he views genetic manipulation as an "apologia of evil," including genetic manipulation resulting from centuries of progress in agriculture.

[Uh, yeah, or something like that]