The Onion!

Well, actually National Review, but it's hard to tell the difference sometimes.

Consider the large landmasses in the northern hemisphere, say north of 55 degrees. These are very extreme climates for human habitation. A population distribution map of Canada shows most people live in a belt running along the southern border with the United States. But add global warming and vast regions would become comfortably habitable. As well, there would be more land available for cultivation. Resources would be easier to extract. True, there might be some dislocations as crops shifted northward, but so what? Economies change all the time. And imagine the land boom up the coastlines as people rushed on up for beachfront property. If global warming is real it is creating the investment opportunity of a lifetime.

Shall we sip mai-tais under the palms while watching the aurora borealis tonight, dear?

Think of the other advantages the Left is ignoring. A warmer wetter world could very well mean more rain forests — hence more biodiversity! We are supposed to value that for some reason, right? And if the ice caps melt and we get more ocean, well that just means more habitat for whales doesn’t it?

The whales and rainforests! Dood, that's like awesome! Yeah, yeah, n' if it gits too hot outside we can all just open our refrigerators to cool things down! If only those damned leebruhls wouldn't be so damned negative about all this:

At the root of global-warming alarmism is a deathly fear of change. It is ironic that the Left, which calls itself progressive, is comprised of some of the most reactionary people on earth. They will come up with endless lists of all the changes that will result from temperature increases, exclusively focusing on the negative, as though change per se is something to be avoided. ...

So if we see global warming for the beneficial trend that it is rather than a looming threat to life and limb, none of the “solutions” being proposed by the alarmists are necessary. There is no challenge posed by a slow-rolling phenomenon like global warming that cannot be overcome; and when deserts start blooming, blizzards stop hitting, and you are enjoying the surfing at your beach house in upper Newfoundland, you won’t care what caused global warming, you’ll just thank goodness it happened.

Wow. Just wow. I don't think I've ever considered that. Let me ponder this for a minute. Wow.

via Bouphonia